sick of putting up this charade

I hate the way i have let myself become

I am hateful, friendless and unfriendly. 

I wasnt this way until my studies started to take a serious toll on me.  

I have basically no friends.  

i do need friends.  

i need friends desperately. 

Books arent friends.  They aren't people. 

Stuffed animals can't be my friends.  

I used to be attractive. 

I have to learn how to put up with people again.

People aren't things you can throw away when you don't need them anymore. 

People are surely boring and insignificant and can make you feel threatened. 

But you do need friends.  

You need people who will annoy you and make you feel like you're wasting your time on them.  

The world you know is so clean and disinfected from any sign of personal misgivings.  You can't live like that much longer.  

Let's make friends again. 

start from boy friends.  They will be biased to be nice to you just because of your appearance and youth.  They will forgive you for certain misgivings. 

The problem is you; you are not willing to forgive people for their misgivings.  

Now get your homework done and start maintaining friends.